My Cigar

cigar adMY CIGAR.

cigar ad

In spite of my physician, who is, entre nous, a fogy,
And for every little pleasure has some pathologic bogy,
Who will bear with no small vices, and grows dismally prophetic
If I wander from the weary way of virtue dietetic;

In spite of dire forewarnings that my brains will all be scattered,
My memory extinguished, and my nervous system shattered,
That my hand will take to trembling, and my heart begin to flutter,
My digestion turn a rebel to my very bread and butter;
As I puff this mild Havana, and its ashes slowly lengthen,
I feel my courage gather and my resolution strengthen:
I will smoke, and I will praise you, my cigar, and I will light you
With tobacco-phobic pamphlets by the learnéd prigs who fight you!
Let him who has a mistress to her eyebrow write a sonnet,
Let the lover of a lily pen a languid ode upon it;
In such sentimental subjects I’m a Philistine and cynic,
And prefer the inspiration drawn from sources nicotinic.
So I sing of you, dear product of (I trust you are) Havana,
And if there’s any question as to how my verses scan, a
Reason is my shyness in the Muses’ aid invoking,
As, like other ancient maidens, they perchance object to smoking.

I have learnt with you the wisdom of contemplative quiescence,
While the world is in a ferment of unmeaning effervescence,
That its jar and rush and riot bring no good one-half so sterling
As your fleecy clouds of fragrance that are now about me curling.
So, let stocks go up or downward, and let politicians wrangle,
Let the parsons and philosophers grope in a wordy tangle,
Let those who want them scramble for their dignities or dollars,
Be millionnaires or magnates, or senators or scholars.
I will puff my mild Havana, and I quietly will query,
Whether, when the strife is over, and the combatants are weary,
Their gains will be more brilliant than its faint expiring flashes,
Or more solid than this panful of its dead and sober ashes.

Source: Pipe and Pouch: The Smoker’s Own Book of Poetry



  1. irishanglican ~ Fr. Robert · April 19, 2014

    I grew-up in the Irish Brit generation 1950’s, early 60’s, where men smoked tobacco in almost ever form, pipe, cigar, and roll your own, and of course buy your store-bought cigarette’s! And almost to a man, those that smoked heavy, and of course inhaled, did not live much past their 60’s (some dying even earlier). My father’s father, of course one of my grandfathers lived to be 79, and he smoked it all in tobacco! But the doctors said he could have lived well into his 90’s had he not smoked! He died of an heart-aneurysm, hardening of the arteries.

    My father, who did NOT smoke, lived till 88! And I don’t smoke myself, and run everyday. But indeed, my times are in “the Father’s hands”! Just another way of looking at things! I am old discipline type! 😉 Semper Fi! (I bet ya knew that already! 😉 )

  2. irishanglican ~ Fr. Robert · April 19, 2014

    WE could really make some fun of “Gay Boy”, since the word has sadly taken on a new meaning in the last 25 years or so! 😉

    • jm · April 19, 2014

      That’s why I selected the ad. 🙂 I thought it was funny.

  3. irishanglican ~ Fr. Robert · April 19, 2014

    Even in my generation, two things you simply weren’t, “a queer and a commie”! Sorry, but that was the blunt of it in my day!

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